Month one: Complete.

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I’ve been living in L.A. a month now.

At one point I wasn’t sure I’d make it this long.

If you’ve read my last entry you’d know that apparently I hired one of the shittiest moving companies because in the span of 2 and a half weeks I was promised my stuff was loaded and on it’s way 4 times, only to find out it was still sitting somewhere back home.

Since I couldn’t be home I spent a lot of time walking and of course, going through the normal feelings of homesick and loneliness that comes with a move this big.

I knew I’d feel a lot better once my stuff was here, but day by day I was beginning to feel that I might not get my stuff at all.

Support from back home and the knowledge I was able to land an agent pretty quick kept me going, but yeah, it was tough coming home to an air mattress around midnight and forcing myself to sleep.

Two days before I was surprised with my stuff, the air mattress I was sleeping in got a hole in it. I tried to fix it but somehow made it worse. So for two days I slept on the floor with no idea when my stuff would be here.

On the third day I woken up by a call saying my stuff was a half hour away.

I went outside and waited. Almost 3 hours later, a huge truck finally pulled up.

Since I had a lot of time to wait, I began to think of the way this moving company had been dicking me around and the two nights on the floor.

I began to fear that my stuff would be damaged or missing, so I made up my mind:

If anything was missing or damaged real bad, I was going to go home, regroup, and figure out my next move.

Nothing was damaged and everything was accounted for.

I told the two polish men that hardly spoke English to just unload and leave as soon as possible –no need to help me unpack.

As a last gift from the shitty moving company, they both asked to use my restroom, and both of them took a dump. Both of them.

I’ve never had so much fun unpacking in my life. I now feel 100 times better and like I actually have a home here.

That was followed by more audition calls and the start of a week-long Improv festival being held at the iO Theater here in L.A. where I got to see a ton of old friends and make new friends.

So the closing of the first month of living here ended on a very good note.

It ended on an emotional one as well.

Last night I was flipping channels and I came upon a pretty good movie called “The Rookie”, starring Dennis Quaid.

The movie is the true life story of Jim Morris, and it’s basically about following your dreams. The tag line of the movie says more than enough:

“The incredible true story of a man who never gave up on his dream”

If you’ve seen it you know what I mean, if you haven’t, Please rent it.

Watching this movie reminded me a lot of the things I have been through, am currently going through, and what I hope to one day go through.

Dennis Quaid does an incredible job of selling you the moment Mr. Morris gets the call that meant all his work and sacrifices had finally paid off.

I imagine that call must feel pretty incredible. Watching that scene makes you think and hope of getting a similar call and what it must feel like to have your work pay finally off.

Watching that scene, and culmination of the movie itself, really hit home for a lot of reasons. Fear…anticipation….hope…the unknown…confusion…..Did I do the right thing?

Then I lost it.

I think everything finally hit me at the same time and I don’t know….I gave in to human emotion, fear, and hope.

I quickly recovered and gave myself and my doggies an assurance that everything will be Ok.

I just have to believe in what I know I can do and be patient.

What do I want? Why I am here?

I want to entertain and be able to make a living doing it. It’s that simple.

In front of the scene, behind the scenes –anywhere, just as long as I’m able to be part of the process that makes people happy by doing what I love doing.

It’s the reason I love being part of the iO Theater and the community that comes with it.

If I don’t ever get that call, I’ll be Ok because at least I’ll know I gave myself an opportunity to get such a call.

Until then, I’ll make sure my phone bill is paid, just in case.

So yeah, I finally feel like I live here and feel a lot better.

Now I have to hustle like I live here, and that’s the area I think will be tough for me personally ‘cause that involves selling yourself, which is something I’ve never been good at.

But I’ll give it my best shot. I promise.

The Adjustment…

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Well, I’m a Los Angeles resident now.

I’ve been living here for a little over a week, and so far the transition has been pretty tough.

I guess every big move comes with adjustments, but dang…

Before I left, I made arrangements to have most of my belongings moved here by a moving company.

I had looked them up before and wasn’t happy with some of the stuff I read, but then they called me back and the lady on the phone did her job by selling me the company and making me feel secure about my move and their company, so I went with them.

They picked up my stuff on April 30^th and promised that once I gave them an address my stuff would be there about 2 or 3 days after.

I could write all about the drama that followed after, but that would just be boring. Long story short, I have been promised 3 times that my stuff would be here, and I still have not received my furniture. I was once again promised that it will be here this weekend, and after getting off the phone with them once again, I was now told that Maybe my stuff will get here between Sunday and Wednesday.

To make matters worse, I just looked them up and they have a terrible history with the Better Business Bureau. Ugh.

Lucky for me, the first day I got here I ran into my old friend, Kevin, who offered me an inflatable mattress along with a blanket and pillow. If it wasn’t for him, I’d be sleeping on the floor.

Because I have no furniture, I’m not home much at all. So I spend most of my days walking around the city more than I’d like to. (Ask Kate Duffy; Cesar hates walking!)

I think because of this, the adjustment to the move is a lot tougher because I often get more homesick than would be normal, I guess.

I’ve walked so much that I’ve gotten to know Hollywood Blvd more than I cared to get to know it. When they refer to this stretch of land as the “Blvd of broken dreams”, they ain’t lying. Kinda sad, really.

In getting familiar with this street I’ve gotten familiar with all the crazies here as well. Oh, there are lots of crazies here.

Like, there’s the one I call “Scooby Shades”; a dude that walks around in shades day or night and always hanging on to a stuffed Scooby Doo doll. There’s also the one I call “Thug Not-Really”, a dude that walks around and randomly stops cars in traffic to flash fake gang signs at them and yell at the driver: “I’ll kick your ass you fat white boy!”, no matter who is driving or what their race is.

There’s also the one I call “Star Lover”, a youngish girl who I see late at night crying at the stars on the Hollywood blvd.

And just two days ago I met a dude I call “Dale Mexicart”. See, I was walking down the street and saw him up ahead fumbling with his cart.

I walked past him and somehow this set him off, because as I was walking, I heard steps and a speeding cart, and then he ran passed me while giving me the stinky-eye. Once he passed me by a few feet, he started to walk normal.

Then as he was crossing the street, his cart got stuck and I just so happened to walk past him again.

Well, he unstuck his cart and once again ran by me giving me the stink-eye.

So I decided to take on the challenge and started running. Before I knew it, I found myself racing a homeless man with a cart. I beat him, looked back and winked at him.

He looked sad and mad at the same time.

That’s a just a few of the crazies I’ve gotten to know. But I have to branch out to get to know the rest of the city because if I ever find myself walking down Hollywood Blvd. and “Scooby Shades” says “’Sup, Chicago?”, I will know I’ve spent too much time on this street and in danger of becoming part of the Broken Dreams Club, something I hope not to do.

At night I spend time at iO West, the sister theater to Chicago’s iO Theater. That’s been an adjustment as well in that things seem to be quite different in this theater, and that makes me miss iO Chicago a ton.

I guess I’ve grown accustomed to having that “Norm!” moment when walking into iO for so long, that it feels weird walking into a place that’s supposed to feel like home and feel like a stranger in a strange town.

From time to time I see people I knew from back home and that helps. But unlike home, people at the theater are pretty spread out throughout the city, so not many hang out because they have to drive home.

So I too go home to force myself to sleep, then it’s the same routine the next day.

But there has been some bright spots to my adjustment; Last week ended on a good note because I got signed by an agent, which is any actor’s goal when coming out here.

This agency seems really nice and seem to really want to work with me and do good things together. Some other Chicago folks whom I respect signed with them so that made me feel better about signing with them as well.

I’ve only been with them a few days and already they have had me go on 3 auditions this week alone, and good auditions too. I’ve never been treated so well in all aspects with an agent, so this is pretty cool.

I’m excited about them and hope to do great things with them.

Before signing with them, I seriously considered going back home for a week or two to figure things out. But they helped me feel better about lots of things.

Well, them and other friends I have here. Like Allyson Brown; this girl has been great. She’s taken me out of the house and has gone out of her way making me feel welcomed here. She’s a great friend. Her and Kevin are gonna get lots of drinks on me because if it wasn’t for them, I’d be one miserable kid.

As for the adjustment, I’ve talked to several people here and they all say the same thing: The first month is the toughest in terms of adjusting. They say I’m just going through the normal things a newcomer to the city goes through and that things will get better.

I’m pretty sure things will start to get better and I’ll start to feel at home –especially if and when my stuff gets here-, but until then, I’m currently in an adjustment period with seemingly good things on the horizon.

So when the homesickness kicks in and I badly crave the life I left behind, I remind myself that I haven’t been here that long, that I have great friends here, I have great friends and loved ones at home sending me their support, and that I got signed by an agency that likes me and is showing it.

Then I take out my phone and look up something my good friend Steve told me before I left:

“…go make the world laugh, bitch. Quit worrying about where you’ve been and enjoy where you’re going.”

Then I look out my window and I’m like: “Bring it, Bitch.”

Then my dogs go: “Hey Asswipe, when’s our stuff getting here?

Then I go: “Maybe between Sunday and Wednesday. Maybe.”

That’s the first 14 days.